Harrowing Memories

The ride was a blur. After answering the call from my mom, I went into autopilot, following my GPS to the location she had texted me. Each second I spent at a stoplight felt hours long. As I approached the accident, the first indicator was the noise. Loud emergency sirens wailed, almost as if crying out in agony. Then as I drew closer, I winced at the bright, blinding lights. The flashes of red and white illuminated the summertime dusk and glinted off of the harrowing array of metal car pieces that were strewn across the road. Police officers directed the long line of slow-moving cars, which held passersby who stared guiltily at the scene, thinking I’m glad that’s not me. My eyes moved frantically, searching for a familiar face. They finally landed on my parents, a huddled blob with arms wrapped tightly around each other. Although I didn’t feel my legs move, I somehow ended up beside them.

“Where is he?” I gasped.

My mom, taking a shaky deep breath, lifted a trembling finger pointed towards the ambulance. There, through the open door of the vehicle, I discerned my younger brother. His head was tilted back, eyes closed, and two paramedics crouched on either side of him, wrapping bandages around each of his arms. At that moment, every horrifying possibility flitted through my mind until I felt my dad’s arm fall across my shoulders and heard the comforting words, “he’s okay.”

This image was one I wish I never had had to see, but know I will never forget. At the time of the crash, my brother was sixteen years old, having swerved into an oncoming car only six days after his birthday. Although both he and the other driver ended up unscathed, save for a few bruises and headaches, the repercussions will continue indefinitely. The beautiful black SUV we shared now sits pitifully in a junkyard, a skeleton of its former frame, and insurance claims proceed to fly back and forth daily.

When I search for answers with my brother –asking him what happened, what he was thinking, why he did what he did– he isn’t able to give a response.

“I just stopped thinking,” he’d say. “I didn’t have enough experience.”

Driver’s education matters. Experience matters. Care matters. Despite parents’ eagerness to coach their newly-permitted fifteen-year-olds, they can only give so much guidance in the passenger seat. A parent, after having been behind the wheel for years, is likely to speed a bit too much, run a few too many stop signs, and honk a few too many times. New drivers should learn how to be defensive, and be taught by someone who knows how to advise them in the best way possible.

I am so fortunate that my brother emerged from his dented vehicle safely. A close friend of mine lost her father to a car accident with an aggressive driver less than a year ago. I’ve held her as she cried and watched the toll that the death has taken on her and her family. Car accidents change not only the lives of those driving, but those in other cars and countless loved ones as well. An incredibly significant number of people drive, and even those who don’t drive ride in cars every day. The entire population is affected by uneducated drivers.

The first step in making a safer population of drivers is to start at the source. The first time a fresh young driver puts his or her hands on the wheel is crucial. The habits one gains initially will carry on each time they drive. In order to start strong, parents should hire instructors with real experience and a goal of promoting safety. Once an instructor feels that the student has a solid understanding of driving practices after a sufficient number of lessons, parents should encourage them to drive as much as possible with their permit. In my family’s case, I was much more excited to practice than my brother was, and thus I felt much more experienced when I finally did pass the exam and get my license.

Along with the initial motivation from adults, driver’s education should continue for as long as a person holds a license. Being comfortable behind the wheel is necessary– until a driver gains too much confidence or aggression that could result in unsafe practices. Even older adults should be advised and aided by their passengers. Holding friends, family, and all operators of a vehicle accountable is vital in protecting the safety of everyone. Never again do I want to experience the sheer terror and pain upon seeing my brother in his accident –no one should. In educating our drivers, we can save them, other drivers, and each loved one from suffering.