Anxious Driver

I was once a member of a community that I was ashamed of. This community is looked down upon and even ridiculed at times. However, I feel as though those that are a part of this community simply understood the gravity and responsibility that driving entails. I did not get my license until I was 24 years old. As most people get their license when they’re 16 or 17 this was always a very shameful part of my identity. What was my problem? How come I seem to be the only one afraid? We are controlling metal boxes on wheels that can go exponentially faster than a human body itself could ever imagine. I saw plenty of friends hop in their cars and speed off into the sunset. It just didn’t seem safe to me.

My anxiety towards driving started when I was very young. I had an aunt who died in a car crash. She was just starting to get her life together and be a great mother to her children. Everyone was so proud of her and ready to see the next step she was going to take in life. Unfortunately, that opportunity was ripped away by the careless driving of her friend. Now, many years later, her children are still without a mother and I without an opportunity to truly understand my aunt. The gruesome details of her death were kept a secret from the children in the family but as I grew older, I’ve learned just how scary irresponsible driving can be. When I turned 18, a good friend of mine died in a car crash as well. To this day I always wonder what would have happened if he told his cousin, “No,” he did not want to go out drinking with him that night. Since then, I had an unadulterated fear of driving. I had tried to grab the wheel and my hands would begin to sweat. People would make fun of me for it. How could I be 20 something years old and scared to drive? It was simple. Phrases like “you’ll be OK just remember you need to be able to drive for others not just for yourself,” and “you get used to it you just have to practice.” Would ring in my head constantly. Yet for years it was to no avail.

I simply didn’t feel safe. And the examples in my life I was given on good drivers were dangerous. And when I finally gained the courage to start practicing driving, I bought my own car. But just like clockwork my car was struck in an accident no fault of my own or the driver. It was just an unfortunate ordeal. I decided to stick to it and try to keep learning how to drive. Eventually I got over my anxiety and was able to go to the DMV to get my license. I have been driving for a year now and I still believe driving is a very serious activity. I believe that most drivers are selfish and only care about getting to their destination. Whether that involves them speeding or doing other illegal things to get there faster.

I believe that empathy tests and classes should be given to people so that they can learn how to care about others before they even touch a steering wheel. If we could simply think about the mother that is simply trying to get home after a hard day of work or the young teen who was just trying to hang out with his friend. If we could think about others before we get into a machine to take us to our destination, maybe we wouldn’t be so careless.

Drivers Ed and other opportunities to be able to learn how to drive and a safe and monitor environment should be free. These opportunities were stripped away from me in high school because my family couldn’t afford for me to go to Drivers Ed. In my school you could take the class, but you would not be able to get your permit without paying a fee. There are ways to get this waived, but it is not told to advertise or shown to parents that it is possible. It’s even worse when you become an adult without taking a drivers Ed class. Driving school is very expensive. I believe something as essential as learning to drive should not break your bank.

In conclusion, I am no longer a part of the community of 20 plus year olds who do not know how to drive. However, I am still anxious when I get behind the wheel. It is something that lessens with time, but it is still there in the back of my mind that at any moment an apathetic driver could be more concerned about taking a bite of their sandwich or getting to work on time than the human lives that are around them. I truly believe that we should have to take empathy courses to get behind the wheel. I think that would be the best solution to help save lives and teach others that every life is important.